an evening ride & anxietyThursday, August 09, 2012
shirt - c/o Modcloth
shorts - thrifted
backpack - c/o Romwe
shoes - c/o Blowfish
Last week Kevin and I went on our first evening ride since I fixed my bike up. The temperatures finally seem to be leveling off and it was the first evening that it wasn't sweltering hot. I'm aware I sound like a big wimp, but I really don't handle the heat well. The slightest bit of heat and my cheeks are bright red and I'm feeling wiped out. Anyway, the bike ride was fantastic. It felt so good to be back on my bike.
...So good that I decided to make myself a little goal to go out on a ride the next morning by myself. That sounds like a silly goal but some time in the last three years (since moving into this house) I became like a hermit. I dread talking to my neighbors for really no particular reason. I swear they're nice people, I'm just awkward. So this lead to me only going outside for very brief periods of time while Kevin wasn't home, really just to check the mail or water my plants. Even then it sometimes took a little talking it up to myself and checking out the window to make sure no one was out there.
Anyways, I did it and I've since made a habit of these bike rides. Right now they're just short, around the block but eventually I'd like to build enough endurance to ride around town. It feels amazing to go outside, enjoy the fresh morning air and the nice neighborhood I live in. I'm still feeling a little bit anxious while riding but doing better each day. I can't wait until I can look back and realize how stupid all of this was.
I'm not sure when all of a sudden I turned into a big ball of anxiety but after realizing just how bad it was I'm 100% determined to kick it's butt. I don't want to live in fear of talking to strangers and even worse, being afraid to go in my own yard for no good reason.
Hope you're having a fabulous day. I'm heading off on a bike ride now! ;)
PS. I'm totally cracking up over how dusty my feet and legs are in that last picture! I didn't even realize.